Very Serious Tips On How To Write Fast

Saturday, July 2, 2016
Camp NaNo has begun! Whether your goal is 5,000 or 100,000, writing fast is very useful with helping to finish a story so you can edit write a new one.

I write very fast. It's just how I do things. 100,000 in a month or 60,000 in two weeks -- it's become my normal writing routine. Yes, I do get exhausted from all the endless typing, but... it's almost hard for me to write slow. Which can be a curse since that means alllll the gibberish. 

Do you want to write faster? Her are my very flawless tips on how to write like a superhuman.


It's very important to write where you can focus. That's why I do most of my writing at night. In a dark room. With no people or distraction.

Preferably I would lock myself away in a dungeon. Its' a rather great place to write a book. And most definitely no distraction.

Writing by a window IS great for creativity and inspiration... but when I'm trying to write fast, the neighbor mowing his lawn becomes the most interesting thing in the world. You probably won't see me during NaNo months. I'll be hiding inside away from the windows because THEY'RE EVIL.

-
Because who needs a plot when you can have lots of words? 

Write whatever comes to mind. Dragons in historical fiction? Five pages of your characters talking about pizza? Describing a sunset in the middle of a snowstorm? 

Do it. 

Piece together any random scenes you want. Words will come surprisingly fast once you start writing about nonsense.
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Middles are hard and annoying. The plot often bogs down, and it's a huge hassle to write. So why not pass the cumbersome task onto someone else who's qualified?

Cats, dogs, ponies (??) -- have them take a turn at the keyboard and see what they can do. Their imagination might be surprisingly powerful. A few typing lessons and they're good to go.

Except, perhaps, for your goldfish. As entertaining as it would be to watch it's little form flop around the keyboard, maybe keep it in its tank. But just an idea. You do what works or you to get those "words" on the page.
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Copy and paste will become your best friend during NaNo events. There's this site called Lorem Ipsum. And what does it do?

It generates random words. Er, random gibberish. Copy and paste 50,000 words worth, and wallah! You have a full novel. You can thank me later.
-
It's a known fact that unicorn horns are magical. I especially know from experience.

About a year ago, I had a dream. It was the night before Camp NaNoWriMo started. And in that dream, there was a shining, glowing unicorn. It came up to me and bent its head -- gesturing like it wanted to be petted.

I touched its horn. I woke up. My writing skills exploded -- my fingers couldn't stop writing fast for the rest of the month. 

The rest is history.
-

And, when all else fails, smash your head against the keyboard. Repeatedly. Over and over. 

Like so: hgbbnnhjgbvb nnm, nb nbvgbnn  m okikloikhyhbnb gtfrg uhyjjk hhjyj  brfttfft jnhmmk gvb  bnjkbfvghnjmj,kmjnhbgnhjm   hbhb jhnjbg.

(I'm not going to even comment on how ridiculous I looked doing that.)

But it works. And it's easy than writing a readable novel.

- - -

Are you starting to understand the process? Sit in an enclosed room, don't bother with the plot, have a pet nearby, use copy and paste, somehow acquire the power of a unicorn horn through a dream, and smash your head against the keyboard repeatedly.

And this is why I complain so much about editing.

// katie grace

Do you have any very serious tips to add to this list? Did it help you understand how I write 100k in a month? 
(unicorn horns and keyboard smashes. that's all there is to it.)

61 comments :

  1. He he no wonder I write so slow, I need more unicorn horns and Lorem Ipsum. I have written 800 towards my 8,000 goal, so I am okay with that at the moment.

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    1. Ooh, that's an awesome start! Are you writing a new book or continuing an old one?

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  2. Oh my, NOW I KNOW! *makes a mental note to do more keyboard smashes* Sometimes I feel like I need to slack waaay off with my first drafts so I can finish them faster, maybe these tips will help. ;P Plus, I really need a laptop so I can hide and write, that might help too.

    I'm really excited about Camp NaNo and getting to work on Monsieur Scattlocke (my dystopian Robin Hood retelling). And my 20k goal! And my cabin, which is full of awesome peoples, and pizza. :D
    Are you doing editing for camp, or starting on something new?

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    1. Do alllllll the keyboard smashes. Mwahaha.
      Awh, you don't have a computer? What do you write with?

      DYSTOPIAN ROBIN HOOD RETELLING? Uhhhh, that sounds awesome. o.o That is such a unique idea! :D

      I am editing for camp. Blerghh. I'm finishing up beta comments of Song of the Desert, and then starting on The Sand Dragon's Song. Eek! Scary.

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    2. The keyboard smashes seem to be working so far! I'm more than a quarter of my way through my 20k Camp goal. :) So excited!
      We've got computers, but with five siblings it's very difficult to find silence to concentrate in the main rooms, so I'd much rather write on a laptop on my bed or something.

      YEAH! I'm loving it actually. And it's kinda my first idea that I really feel could come to something eventually, which is a REALLY COOL FEELING. I really need to write some kind of blurb because when people ask about it I either go 'uh...dystopian Robin Hood' or go off for half an hour about the state of the world and every little detail of why this is happening. And in general, sidetracks from sidetracks until I've completely confused them. :D

      Ooh, yes. I'm SO looking forward to The Sand Dragon's Song! Keep on writing. *gives you some virtual pizza for the editing*

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    3. Eek! You go, girl!
      Ahhh, that makes sense. Sigh, that would be difficult. Find big headphones and blast the music. xD

      "Dystopian robin hood" is a better description than I have of my novel. And it's simple, describes the main plot (ish), and just sounds awesome. So I think that's awesome. :P

      *NEEDS ALL THE PIZZA TO SURVIVE ALL THE EDITING*

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  3. THANKS FOR THIS POST!!!! School has been so stressful and I really want to binge-write on the weekends or the days I have no school.

    I'm thinking of 10k per weekend, so that way I'll maybe be able to get a book down in 8 weeks!

    I don't have a pet of my own but I can always borrow a friend's puppy to write for me :P AND YES I ALWAYS FORGET THE MIDDLE PART OF MY STORY. I outline a bit but when I start writing everything changes. It's kinda amusing, really.

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    1. Wow, that's an awesome way of putting it. Eight weeks doesn't seem so bad if you write 10k a weekend. And if you can get extra during the week... even better!

      I'm glad we're able to amuse ourselves while writing to keep our minds a LITTLE sane. :P

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  4. No tips to add because I'm still trying to finish a book (it will happen someday lol) but holy crap, you wrote 100K in a month???? I just read your post but still, HOW?? I get burned out *soo fast.** Last NaNo my word count was actually 3 or 4K above the goal for the first week...And then halfway through the second week, I came across ALL the plot holes and well.. bye bye project. (I love how you just wrote to forget the plot. I mean I guess I could do this but I know if I did, I'd (a) not forgive myself & (b) delete the book because of course I'm not going to edit that.. that ... THING.. :( Also noo I don't have a pet!! I must buy one immediately and train it to write. You're a genius! XD

    – Rachana @ Spun

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    1. I have no idea how, actually. Well, actually, by smashing my head on my keyboard multiple times. Ha. xD

      I knowwww. I don't ever want to edit the thing, but the NaNo events help get me through it Somehow.

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  5. Ok, unicorn hair? Gibberish? Katie, you're a going to Hogwarts. :P I can write 76k in three weeks, but the last week of July I want to try 50k in one weeks.

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    1. 50k in one week would be awesome. I totally want to do that now. It's only 7k a day... so I bet I could do it. New NaNo goal coming up. xD

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  6. I write VERY fast - but a lot ends up in gibberish XD. I will try to find a unicorn horn and I will also smash my head against the keyboard (if not the wall) XD

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    1. The wall always works as an alternative. It doesn't give you the words, but it has the same sort of feel. xD

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  7. Replies
    1. Yesss that's good. Semi fast is a good speed.

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  8. Mwhaha, this was such a fun post. :P I write... semi-fast? I like to take "quality is better than quantity" at least partially into consideration, because I don't want to /always/ be typing gibberish. xD

    But I did love this list. Did I ever tell you that you are hilarious? xD

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    1. Quality is better than quantity is an amazing tip.
      But. I'm just very bad at obeying it. xD *grumblegrumble*

      Well thanks. xD

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  9. Oh my goshhh I'm cracking up! XD You're hilarious, Katie Grace. Anyways, no wonder I'm such a slow writer. My favorite way to up the word count is copying and pasting the dictionary. Voila! Lots of intelligent words!

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    1. Okay, that was actually super funny. I can't stop laughing, now. xD

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  10. This is one of the best post I've read about writing! XD Totally sensible.

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  11. DUDE YES. brb doing all of these. Although, I have been doing the keyboard smashing quite a bit, SO THANK YOU FOR MENTIONING THAT. This honestly makes me feel good about my writing!!

    *cough* WELLLLLLLLL UMM. Haha XD I LOVED THIS POST KATIE <3 so hilarious!

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  12. As someone who writes very fast also, I can confirm that these all work. I would also recommend a blood sacrifice. The Writing Void prefers small chickens and/or waterfowl, sacrificed at midnight. *nodnod*

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    1. I completely agree. Thank you for your wisdom.

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  13. lol. Katie, dear, I think we have discovered just why you hate editing so much. HOW DO YOU DO IT. Goodness. I don't think I could. (I'm a mix of a perfectionist, and not also..so yeah.)

    This post is just too amazing for it's own good.

    So HOW is editing going? I'm on day 2 and I've already for over 3k. So I'm going great. Plus, it's totally feeling easy (for now). xD

    oh, and #6 is always great. Maybe it'll knock some ideas into your head. Ya know, your head touching all those letters may strike something. lol

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    1. *sobs at all the editing*

      EDITING IS GOING. I've finished my sixth draft and am very excited about itt. SO now I can just go through and proofread it, and then I can start on the sequel! EEP.

      HA. I hope so. xD

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    2. SIXTH DRAFT. *stumbles into chair and trips over cat in process* WHAT.

      So, publishing next??? ;)

      Camp is going great for me BTW. I'm at over 5k. :D

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  14. Thank You for this post!!!! Your post always seem to help people and thats a good thing!!!!!!!

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    1. I'm not sure how entirely helpful THIS one was, buuut. xD Thank you!

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  15. Gah, yes. I swear the five pages of characters talking about pizza is me. And glad to know I'm not alone in the the unicorn horn dream. That's seriously where I get all my best stuff! ;)

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  16. This is wonderful and so perfectly timed because I'm totally not procrastinating on a blog post right now...
    I found you through Abbiee's blog, and I'm having such a fun time looking through your posts! You've got yourself a new follower;-)

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    1. *pokes you* Go do the thing! Work on the blog post! :P (did you ever get it done?)

      Awhhh, thank you so much! I'm glad to have you around, now. <3

      Delete
  17. This is exactly what I needed! I shall now let my dog write a chapter or two while I relax and then bang my head against the keyboard because the chapters my dog wrote are horrendous.

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    1. XD That sounds like a wonderful plan. Many coherent words. ;)

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  18. I NEEDED THISSS I can write quickly but not as quickly as I'd like and as this is Camp NaNo month, I need to write quickly!! Thanks for this!!

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    1. WRITE WRITE WRITE! DO THE WORDS, ABBY!

      What's your goal for Camp NaNo?

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  19. Haha I love this!! I am not at all a fast writer. I feel like I could be, if there weren't distractions. I am SO distracted! I could be in a dark dungeon but be distracted by the darkness. GAH. It's crazy.
    Great post! I loved reading it! :D Good luck on NaNo!! I'm hoping to be able to get into that soon. :)

    ~Megan <333
    (megans-journals.blogspot.com)

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    1. "but be distracted by the darkness." Oh my gosh, Megan, you crack me up. xD

      Thank youuu! Have you ever done a NaNo event before?

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  20. I LOVE THIS!!!!!! This was so helpful and awesome, like I can't even put it into words :D

    ~Kiley
    thecountrygurl.blogspot.com

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  21. I need a unicorn horn! My writing is so slow. It takes me like 4 hours to write a couple thousand words. I also overthink everything, so I think I need to include pizza discussions and random dragons. xD

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    1. YES I totally feel you on the overthinking thing. It is a very hard struggle. :P

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  22. I'LL LET MY MAGICAL DRAGON MUSE WRITE ALL THE WORDS FOR ME AND THEN BANG MY HEAD ON THE KEYBOARD SOME THIS IS PERFECTION. *promptly goes searching for a unicorn*

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    1. THAT SOUNDS LIKE AN EXCELLENT PLAN I ONE HUNDRED PERCENT APPROVE

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  23. Awesome tips Katie! Thanks for sharing!! <3

    Grace
    golden halcyon

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    1. You're so welcome -- thanks for reading! Not that they were super helpful or anything, but... eh. xD

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  24. Now I'm all set to write a million word novel. Thank you! I don't know how I lived without these tips. I feel follow that head bashing tip more often than is healthy.
    Sophie | The Techno Maid

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    1. Sameee. I feel like all writers use it a bit more than healthy. Guess it just adds to our craziness and insanity. :P

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  25. My cat agrees that she has great ideas for the middle part of the writing process.

    But I told her to keep her fuzzy paws to herself.

    I too (when actually writing) like to write fast. The words, once started, just flow out of me, a satisfying and terrifying feeling!

    I find that simply sitting down and writing helps, even if you aren't "in the mood." Many authors keep waiting and waiting for "the mood" but it is finicky and bends to every wind of procrastination known to man. Instead, write against "the mood." Then you will find that "the mood" isn't as important as you thought.

    This is how I, the less author-type of my sister and I, finished my novel before my sister, even though my schedule was three times busier. I made myself write and she fretted over the exact plot and the elusive "mood."

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    1. Ahh, yes. It's very hard to write without the mood, but I've found that rarely I ever have the mood, so I've begun to get used to it. And then when the mood strikes, it's double the awesome. xD

      GO YOU. You're awesome. *nod*

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  26. Oh my goodness, Katie, this is EXACTLY my system! Especially smashing my head against the keyboard. But you forgot to mention that the magic of a unicorn horn helps keep you from getting a headache from all the keyboard smashing. *nods*

    What are you talking about? I let my goldfish write portions of my novel all the time. He never complains. I also let the cat write, but she doesn't have the same literary touch. I don't like editing her portions very much.

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    1. Right. Of course. How could I forget that important detail?

      Ooh. I'd like to see video of this magical writing goldfish. I feel like it would give me great inspiration. And giggles. xD

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  27. This is hilarious, Katie. The unicorn tip, oh my gosh. And Lorem Ipsum! I'm gonna have to give that one a serious go. (No really.) #2 really does help however. I'm writing this down: "Words will come surprisingly fast once you start writing about nonsense." That's great! I think. And think and think and overthink until I go insane thinking about my plot. It's a major problem. I need your can-do attitude.

    Oh by the way, I tagged you for a writerly tag! It fits for Katie The Speed Writer. I hope you can participate. :)

    http://forthebookish.com/the-wisteria-writer-tag/

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    1. "That's great! I think.
      ^ oh my gosh, Emily, you cracked me up. You're just the best. xD

      OOH. TAG. THANK YOU. I will have to check this out. *nodnod*

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  28. OH MY GOODNESS YOU'RE A GENIUS!! Lol. I totally cracked up because I didn't expect this post to NOT be serious. I'm glad it wasn't! The lorem ipsum thing . . . ingenious! And I bet it would be a pain to edit at the end. But that way you'll easily get to nine billion words! ;)

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    1. And who doesn't want to read a nine billion word novel, right? ;)

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  29. I KNEW you wouldn't share your secrets... they never do *side eye*

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  30. Keyboards smash is my preferred method. ;)

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